{"id":5997,"date":"2018-05-12T14:45:06","date_gmt":"2018-05-12T18:45:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/?p=5997"},"modified":"2021-05-05T23:15:44","modified_gmt":"2021-05-06T03:15:44","slug":"what-im-missing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/","title":{"rendered":"#MEAwareness &#8211; and here&#8217;s what I&#8217;m missing"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>So, I&#8217;ve written about my <a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/category\/illness\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">chronic illnesses<\/a> a lot. I even spent the entire last <a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/category\/atozchallenge2016\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">#AtoZChallenge (2016)<\/a> writing about it, under the theme &#8220;<a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/category\/dsavannahdefects\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">dSavannah Defects<\/a>&#8221; (aka things that are wrong with me), a category I&#8217;ve continued to use because, well, I like the name.<\/p>\n<p>And I&#8217;ve spent the past week frantically tweeting and posting a BUNCH of articles &amp; whatnot this week for #MEAwareness Month, and for the <a href=\"http:\/\/millionsmissing.meaction.net\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">#MillionsMissing<\/a> events that will be held today, this Saturday, May 12. (And a <span style=\"color: #77287b;\"><b>HUGE THANK YOU<\/b><\/span> to everyone who has commented, liked, shared, messaged me, donated, and in some way encouraged me in this effort.)<\/p>\n<p>But&#8230; I may not have spelled out for you exactly, in all its vulnerable detail, how it effects me (or is &#8220;affects&#8221;? My brain can&#8217;t figure it out.).\u00a0 (Obviously, not writing this blog on a regular basis and not participating in the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.a-to-zchallenge.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">#AtoZChallenge<\/a> is one example of things I can no longer do.)<\/p>\n<p>I am about 95% housebound &#8211; leaving only to go to doctors&#8217; appointments &#8211; and about 50% bedbound.<\/p>\n<p>Inspired by <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ajourneythroughthefog.co.uk\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"home noopener noreferrer\">A Journey Through the Fog<\/a>, and her heart-wrenching story\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.ajourneythroughthefog.co.uk\/2018\/05\/my-story-living-with-severe-m-e\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">&#8220;Why do so many people still refuse to believe Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME) exists?&#8221;<\/a>, plus the fact that it&#8217;s #MEAwareness Month, and today is our Global Day of Action, here&#8217;s a non-comprehensive list of things I am missing (in no particular order of importance). Things I can no longer do. Things that I could do without thinking. That I took for granted.<\/p>\n<p>This is very embarrassing to share, this <span style=\"color: #77287b;\"><b>list of things I can no longer do<\/b><\/span>. It&#8217;s depressing when I see it all written out like this. Looking at the &#8220;before&#8221; pictures in my images is bittersweet. And the &#8220;now&#8221; photo of me [at the bottom] is embarrassing and sad too.<\/p>\n<h2><a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6047\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/millionsmissing_me_art\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"1800,1471\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"millionsmissing_me_art\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-300x245.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-1024x837.jpg\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-6047\" src=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-1024x836.jpg\" alt=\"I'm one of the #MillionsMissing - and I'm missing creating\" width=\"389\" height=\"318\" \/><\/a><strong>Creating!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Writing poetry, short stories, and my never-to-be-finished novel (see a few examples of my writing in #<a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/category\/fictionfriday\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Fiction<\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/category\/fictionfriday\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Friday<\/a>)<\/li>\n<li>Winning awards for my writing<\/li>\n<li>Painting, drawing, and even simply coloring<\/li>\n<li>Crocheting afghans (every new baby in my life got one, plus lots of friends), scarves, Christmas ornaments, and more<\/li>\n<li>Making jewelry and playing with beads, especially special orders (like being given the directions &#8220;I want big, blue, and chunky&#8221; and it being exactly what they wanted)<\/li>\n<li>Taking photographs with my nice camera (Nikon D60) hubs gave me one year for my birthday<\/li>\n<li>Selling my creations in galleries and art stores<\/li>\n<li>Having my art and photographs in art shows (included juried and members-only)<\/li>\n<li>Being an active part of writing and artist communities<\/li>\n<li>Attending art and writing classes and learning new techniques<\/li>\n<li>Singing in my band<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h2><a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career.jpg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6046\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/millionsmissing_me-career\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"1800,1471\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"millionsmissing_me-career\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career-300x245.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career-1024x836.jpg\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-6046\" src=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career-1024x836.jpg\" alt=\"I'm one of the #MillionsMissing - and I'm missing my career\" width=\"389\" height=\"318\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career-1024x836.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career-300x245.jpg 300w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-career.jpg 1800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 389px) 100vw, 389px\" \/><\/a><strong>My Career!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Helping promote artists, authors, and musicians, including right here on this blog through my <a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/category\/the-questions\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">The Questions<\/a> series<\/li>\n<li>Developing relationships<\/li>\n<li>Mentoring young people<\/li>\n<li><strong>Teaching<\/strong>, even grading papers<\/li>\n<li>Putting together PowerPoints for lectures<\/li>\n<li>Developing class activities<\/li>\n<li>Working with students to help them learn and grow<\/li>\n<li>Mentoring even after they are no longer my students<\/li>\n<li><strong>Doing marketing<\/strong> (though I don\u2019t miss managing events!)<\/li>\n<li>Writing and producing advertisements, press releases, websites, and even memos<\/li>\n<li>Doing graphic design and creating brochures and flyers<\/li>\n<li>Taking the perfect photograph needed for any project<\/li>\n<li>Knowing how to use the Adobe programs I used to teach (I just stare at them now, wondering why a photo won&#8217;t crop, when I&#8217;ve actually chosen the magic eraser tool or something else)<\/li>\n<li>Having press releases I\u2019d written be published verbatim in newspapers<\/li>\n<li>Designing, writing, coding, and maintaining websites<\/li>\n<li>Helping small businesses and authors develop their brands via my freelance work<\/li>\n<li>Fundraising from individuals, companies, and grant opportunities for non-profits<\/li>\n<li><strong>Editing<\/strong> \u2013 it used to be my superpower, and I&#8217;m mentioned in a bunch of acknowledgements because of my work on them! (such as <em><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/2rBY2uj\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">A Splintered Dream<\/a><\/em> by Chuck Walsh), and even have a few books dedicated to me<\/li>\n<li>Helping authors find their own unique voice<\/li>\n<li>Designing and writing others\u2019<strong> Resumes<\/strong> and helping them find jobs<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h2><a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends.jpg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6045\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/millionsmissing_me_friends\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"1800,1471\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"millionsmissing_me_friends\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends-300x245.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends-1024x836.jpg\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-6045\" src=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends-1024x836.jpg\" alt=\"I'm one of the #MillionsMissing - and I'm missing my friends\" width=\"389\" height=\"318\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends-1024x836.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends-300x245.jpg 300w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_friends.jpg 1800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 389px) 100vw, 389px\" \/><\/a><strong>My Friends &amp; Being Social!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Watching the young people in my life grow up (I have young relatives I\u2019ve met all of once)<\/li>\n<li>Going on adventures, to anywhere, planned or not<\/li>\n<li>Going hiking<\/li>\n<li>Poking around antique stores<\/li>\n<li>Visiting galleries and art stores<\/li>\n<li>Eating at nice restaurants<\/li>\n<li>Attending theater performances, art shows, and concerts<\/li>\n<li>Traveling<\/li>\n<li>Volunteering<\/li>\n<li>Helping others, whether by lending my talents or by donating money or by promoting them in some way<\/li>\n<li>Visiting bookstores<\/li>\n<li>Attending booksignings<\/li>\n<li>Snuggling and being intimate with my husband<\/li>\n<li>Visiting and helping my in-laws<\/li>\n<li>Going to the movies<\/li>\n<li>Throwing parties<\/li>\n<li>Going to writers groups<\/li>\n<li>Traveling across the country to visit family<\/li>\n<li>Holidays \u2013 I actually ended up sleeping through the family Christmas dinner last year<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life.jpg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6050\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/millionsmissing_me-life\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"1800,1471\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"millionsmissing_me-life\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life-300x245.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life-1024x836.jpg\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-6050\" src=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life-1024x836.jpg\" alt=\"I'm one of the #MillionsMissing - and I'm missing LIFE\" width=\"389\" height=\"318\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life-1024x836.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life-300x245.jpg 300w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me-life.jpg 1800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 389px) 100vw, 389px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h2><strong>My life!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li>Earning my own money (I haven\u2019t been able to work since December 2014; that\u2019s why I chose that date as my \u201cMissing since\u201d)<\/li>\n<li>Donating to worthy causes and people in need<\/li>\n<li>Going shopping, even for groceries<\/li>\n<li>Cleaning the house<\/li>\n<li>Doing laundry<\/li>\n<li>Sweeping<\/li>\n<li>Fixing meals<\/li>\n<li>Cleaning the stove<\/li>\n<li>Reading lots of books and reviewing them (tho I still remain a member of the\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/2rB6Wbk\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Amazon Vine<\/a> reviewer program)<\/li>\n<li>Watching \u201ceducational\u201d TV and movies and documentaries<\/li>\n<li>Easily following complicated plot lines in books and TV shows and movies<\/li>\n<li>Lifting weights and exercising<\/li>\n<li>Eating whatever I want without fear of getting ill<\/li>\n<li>Driving my car and playing music and singing along<\/li>\n<li>Leaving the house without fear of terrible post-exertional malaise (PEM)<\/li>\n<li>Opening car doors<\/li>\n<li>Being able to open medication bottles and not drop them<\/li>\n<li>Being dependable<\/li>\n<li>Doing what I say I will do<\/li>\n<li>Riding in the car for more than five minutes without severe, sob-inducing pain<\/li>\n<li>Making plans and actually being able to do them<\/li>\n<li>Not feeling excruciating debilitating pain every second of my life<\/li>\n<li>Being able to wear my cute clothes and shoes<\/li>\n<li>25 of the 40 pounds I\u2019ve lost<\/li>\n<li>Having pants and clothes that fit<\/li>\n<li>Being able to wear whatever I want without the textures causing me pain<\/li>\n<li>Waking up without being in tears from the pain<\/li>\n<li>Being able to work in the yard and pull weeds and have a garden<\/li>\n<li>Not having to weigh every single action I make and decide if my body can handle it and if the \u201cpayment\u201c will be worth it<\/li>\n<li>Feeling like a productive member of society<\/li>\n<li>Believing that if you get sick, a doctor can help you<\/li>\n<li>Being able to walk the dog around the neighborhood, or take her to a park or the beach<\/li>\n<li>Getting out of bed without thinking about it or it taking forever or having to force myself to move through the pain<\/li>\n<li>Going out to eat \u2013 or to do anything outside the house \u2013 on the spur of the moment<\/li>\n<li>Bathing, showering, shaving, grooming, etc. without having to lay down for at least an hour if not more afterwords, and doing it more than once a week<\/li>\n<li>Lifting anything that weighs more than 5 lbs, and sometimes, lifting anything at all<\/li>\n<li>Moving without gasping<\/li>\n<li>Waking up refreshed<\/li>\n<li>Doing anything that needs doing<\/li>\n<li>Having more than one to two \u201cusable hours\u201d on an \u201cok\u201d day \u2013 and only having at most three \u201cok\u201d days a week<\/li>\n<li>My quick mind and ready wit<\/li>\n<li>Not having to understand medical terms and symptoms and illnesses<\/li>\n<li>Not being a \u201cscience experiment\u201d (in other words, having to try all kinds of medications and treatments in the hope that something will help me)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I thought about putting the &#8220;why I can&#8217;t&#8221; after every single item &#8211; but it would make this post incredibly long(er), and be very very repetitive.<\/p>\n<p>Essentially, I can&#8217;t do any of these things because I never know how doing will affect (effect?) me, in three major ways: exhaustion, fatigue, and brain fog.<\/p>\n<p>Every single movement, no matter how small, causes me pain, as I wrote about in the post <a title=\"imagining pain away (or, it don\u2019t work that way)\" href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/imagining-pain-away\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">&#8220;imagining pain away (or, it don\u2019t work that way)&#8221;<\/a>. The pain is always there &#8211; sort of like a background hum &#8211; that never relents, but sometimes it&#8217;s worse than others. And doing anything, no matter how minor, can make it flare.<\/p>\n<p>And doing anything causes bone-crushing exhaustion. Or muscle-crushing. As someone wrote in response to a facebook post (I apologize, I can&#8217;t remember who to give them credit), it&#8217;s like my body is a piece of metal and the earth is a giant magnet. (Yes, I am flaring in pain AND crashing in exhaustion right.now.)<\/p>\n<p>My reflexes are slow, my vision has degenerated and it&#8217;s like I&#8217;m looking through a grey shroud, my body shakes on the inside so much I drop things and crash into the wall. Sometimes the tiniest sound can cause an amazing amount of pain sproing throughout my body. Sometimes I have to stay in a darkened room because I can&#8217;t tolerate the light. Sometimes I have to stay out of the kitchen entirely because the slightest smell of <em>anything <\/em>can trigger an attack.<\/p>\n<p>I forget words. I speak slowly, like I&#8217;m trying to learn English, as I try to figure out what I am trying to say. I can&#8217;t concentrate on books. I can&#8217;t follow the plot. I can&#8217;t remember simple things, like why I stood up. Or if I took my medication. Or if I fed the fur-children.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #77287b;\"><b>This is what Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (MEcfs) looks like, and what it steals from us. <\/b><\/span><\/p>\n<h2><strong>This is what I&#8217;m Missing.<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted.jpg\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6066\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/millionsmissing_me_persisted\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"1800,1471\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"millionsmissing_me_persisted\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted-300x245.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted-1024x836.jpg\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-6066\" src=\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted-1024x836.jpg\" alt=\"I'm missing, but persisting\" width=\"640\" height=\"522\" srcset=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted-1024x836.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted-300x245.jpg 300w, https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_persisted.jpg 1800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>PS. If there aren&#8217;t errors and repetition in this post, I&#8217;d be very surprised.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So, I&#8217;ve written about my chronic illnesses a lot. I even spent the entire last #AtoZChallenge (2016) writing about it, under the theme &#8220;dSavannah Defects&#8221; (aka things that are wrong with me), a category I&#8217;ve continued to use because, well, &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[117,127,119,120,44,81,121,67,12,35,24,30,86,68,83,82],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5997","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dsavannahdefects","category-mecfsawareness","category-advocacy","category-chronicillness","category-community","category-depression","category-disability","category-giving-to-others","category-hard-work","category-illness","category-insomnia","category-learning","category-making-a-difference","category-perseverance","category-shining-a-light","category-the-dark-places"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>#MEAwareness - and here&#039;s what I&#039;m missing - dSavannahRambles<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"#MEAwareness - and here&#039;s what I&#039;m missing - dSavannahRambles\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"So, I&#8217;ve written about my chronic illnesses a lot. I even spent the entire last #AtoZChallenge (2016) writing about it, under the theme &#8220;dSavannah Defects&#8221; (aka things that are wrong with me), a category I&#8217;ve continued to use because, well, &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"dSavannahRambles\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2018-05-12T18:45:06+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-05-06T03:15:44+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1800\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1471\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"dSavannah\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"dSavannah\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"8 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"dSavannah\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049\"},\"headline\":\"#MEAwareness &#8211; and here&#8217;s what I&#8217;m missing\",\"datePublished\":\"2018-05-12T18:45:06+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-05-06T03:15:44+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\"},\"wordCount\":1586,\"commentCount\":4,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-1024x836.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"#dSavannahDefects\",\"#MEcfsAwareness\",\"advocacy\",\"chronicillness\",\"community\",\"depression\",\"disability\",\"giving to others\",\"hard work\",\"illness\",\"insomnia\",\"learning\",\"making a difference\",\"perseverance\",\"shining a light\",\"the dark places\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\",\"name\":\"#MEAwareness - and here's what I'm missing - dSavannahRambles\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-1024x836.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2018-05-12T18:45:06+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2021-05-06T03:15:44+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg\",\"width\":1800,\"height\":1471,\"caption\":\"I'm one of the #MillionsMissing - and I'm missing creating\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"#MEAwareness &#8211; and here&#8217;s what I&#8217;m missing\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"dSavannahRambles\",\"description\":\"plays well with words\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":[\"Person\",\"Organization\"],\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049\",\"name\":\"dSavannah\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/dSR_skeleton_profile_rambles.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/dSR_skeleton_profile_rambles.jpg\",\"width\":400,\"height\":400,\"caption\":\"dSavannah\"},\"logo\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\"},\"description\":\"~ #disabled #spoonie fighting numerous, chronic, painful #InvisibleIllnesses ~ also #wife #feminist #ally #advocate #papyrophiliac #DogCatTurtleWrangler\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.dsavannah.com\/blog\/\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/author\/dsavannah\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"#MEAwareness - and here's what I'm missing - dSavannahRambles","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"#MEAwareness - and here's what I'm missing - dSavannahRambles","og_description":"So, I&#8217;ve written about my chronic illnesses a lot. I even spent the entire last #AtoZChallenge (2016) writing about it, under the theme &#8220;dSavannah Defects&#8221; (aka things that are wrong with me), a category I&#8217;ve continued to use because, well, &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;","og_url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/","og_site_name":"dSavannahRambles","article_published_time":"2018-05-12T18:45:06+00:00","article_modified_time":"2021-05-06T03:15:44+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1800,"height":1471,"url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"dSavannah","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"dSavannah","Est. reading time":"8 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/"},"author":{"name":"dSavannah","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049"},"headline":"#MEAwareness &#8211; and here&#8217;s what I&#8217;m missing","datePublished":"2018-05-12T18:45:06+00:00","dateModified":"2021-05-06T03:15:44+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/"},"wordCount":1586,"commentCount":4,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-1024x836.jpg","articleSection":["#dSavannahDefects","#MEcfsAwareness","advocacy","chronicillness","community","depression","disability","giving to others","hard work","illness","insomnia","learning","making a difference","perseverance","shining a light","the dark places"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/","url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/","name":"#MEAwareness - and here's what I'm missing - dSavannahRambles","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art-1024x836.jpg","datePublished":"2018-05-12T18:45:06+00:00","dateModified":"2021-05-06T03:15:44+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/millionsmissing_me_art.jpg","width":1800,"height":1471,"caption":"I'm one of the #MillionsMissing - and I'm missing creating"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/what-im-missing\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"#MEAwareness &#8211; and here&#8217;s what I&#8217;m missing"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#website","url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/","name":"dSavannahRambles","description":"plays well with words","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":["Person","Organization"],"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/f84d36e99886981fab3a8a2ad4613049","name":"dSavannah","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/dSR_skeleton_profile_rambles.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/dSR_skeleton_profile_rambles.jpg","width":400,"height":400,"caption":"dSavannah"},"logo":{"@id":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/"},"description":"~ #disabled #spoonie fighting numerous, chronic, painful #InvisibleIllnesses ~ also #wife #feminist #ally #advocate #papyrophiliac #DogCatTurtleWrangler","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.dsavannah.com\/blog\/"],"url":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/author\/dsavannah\/"}]}},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2Crn0-1yJ","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5997","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5997"}],"version-history":[{"count":30,"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5997\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8542,"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5997\/revisions\/8542"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5997"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5997"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dsavannah.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5997"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}