Category Archives: illness

imagining pain away (or, it don’t work that way)

Pain is all about waiting. Waiting for it to stop. Waiting for medication to work. Waiting to see a doctor. Waiting for others to believe you. Waiting for a future cure.

dSavannah note: I started this post – well, I can’t remember when – and I’ve been working on it ever since. Even if it’s not quite “ready”, and I can’t think of a better headline, I’m just gonna publish it… I’m sick of looking at it. And I’d like to cross at least one thing off my massive to-do list. (Which never ever ends. Being a Sick Person is harder work than you’d imagine.) I had a doctor tell me that he was able to have a dental procedure with no novocaine because he imagined he was on a beach with storm clouds out on the horizon. And that he concentrated on the clouds. And thus he had no pain. He didn’t say it explicitly, … Continue reading

Posted in #dSavannahDefects, advocacy, chronicillness, depression, giving to others, health, illness, insomnia, making a difference, science, shining a light, the dark places | 7 Comments

Important calls to ME patients

A global day of action for ME patients to share their stories. More on their site.

dSavannah note: Don’t know what’s come over me to be posting again in the same week, but… again, this is important. Please spread it far and wide! Numerous, numerous!¬†Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME) patients have become far worse – some now 100% bedbound! – after being forced to do treatments based on bad science, after being told the disease was in their heads (like Jen Brea), that they made it up, that they must not want to get better, and other terrible things. Dr. Sarah Myhill, a UK physician, medical writer and researcher, is working on a complaint to the UK GMC (General Medical Council) about the amazing amount of harm one particular study,¬†PACE, has done to ME patients across the globe. PACE has now been discredited, … Continue reading

Posted in advocacy, chronicillness, giving to others, hard work, health, illness, making a difference, perseverance, shining a light, the dark places | Leave a comment

what is unrest?

dSavannah note: I started this post eons ago, but my brain just hasn’t functioned enough to finish it. So, this one may be more disjointed than usual. And I’ve taken off the bits I can’t figure out how to write properly, and will (eventually, maybe) put them in another post. If I wait until I can express myself the way I want, this post will never get published. And this is too important to wait. A bit ago (part of my illnesses is that time runs together and I have no real concept of it anymore), I wrote about Lady Gaga’s documentary, and included her tweet that said she hoped the film it would raise awareness for fibromyalgia and other painful, invisible illnesses. As I … Continue reading

Posted in #dSavannahDefects, community, giving to others, hard work, health, illness, inspiration, joy, learning, making a difference, perseverance, shining a light, the dark places | 2 Comments

#ChronicIllness: the worst job in the world

This photo of a photo is from my first "real" job out of college. When they didn

dSavannah note: This is another one of them there posts I wrote a while back and am just now publishing. Didn’t do much to it, either. Just added the photo and a few words here and there. And futzed with the formatting, cuz, perfectionism. Please forgive typos. My brain ain’t what it used to be. I have somehow managed to acquire the worst job ever, and I have held it exclusively for the past three+ years. To tell you just how awful this job is, consider this: It’s 24/7/365. No time off. Ever. No benefits. There is no pay; in fact, I have to spend money! Lots and lots of money! Having fun is a thing of the past. A social life is prohibited. Okay, … Continue reading

Posted in #dSavannahDefects, depression, health, illness, insomnia, mental illness, perseverance, shining a light | 6 Comments

It’s not the forest … It’s the leaves

dsavannah_defects_noballs

New: Follow my blog on the app Bloglovin. You can also follow by putting your email address in the first box there on the right, and then see my new posts via the WordPress app or in your email. And, as always, please forgive any typos. If that title is too obtuse for you, I’ll put it another way: Being chronically ill sucks, make no mistake. Having chronic, unrelenting pain sucks as well. Being told by a specialist doctor (as I was recently) that I’m in the top 1% of severe fibromyalgia cases and that I’m never going to get better is also awful. But what wears me down, bit by bit, is the rest of it, the small things: the leaves, if you will. … Continue reading

Posted in #dSavannahDefects, health, illness, insomnia, mental illness, perseverance, science, shining a light, the dark places, wishes | 2 Comments

Me too

me_too

dSavannah note: Trigger Warning: sexual harassment, assault, abuse. These words are in response to the stories that broke very recently regarding a studio head and numerous women who claim he sexually harassed and/or abused them. I will not speak his name. But I honor all of the women for coming forward and speaking out. I’m almost afraid of posting this, but with #MeToo trending right now, I am setting aside my innate fear, and publishing what I felt compelled to write last night (in the middle of the night. Instead of sleeping. The voices in my head wouldn’t shut up until I did). I am adding my voice to the cacophony, in the hopes things might change. #MeToo I deluded myself for years that I’d … Continue reading

Posted in abuse, depression, evil, hell, history, illness, making a difference, shining a light, the dark places, violence | 6 Comments

My thoughts on Lady Gaga’s documentary & chronic illness

Lady Gaga at a doctor

dSavannah note: Yes, this is my first post in a long time. Yes, there are probably errors. Everything sounds great in my head, and then I go to write it out, and my brain drops out and my eyes cross and my back spasms and the words turn to mush. (A fun benefit of having a chronic illness.) I’ll admit: I’ve never really been a fan of Lady Gaga. I’ve never actively disliked her either, but I never really cared for her or her crazy persona with the wild outfits and wigs, or her pop music (I’m more a blues, alternative, rock – and occasionally rap – girl). But the chronic illness community has been talking about Lady Gaga’s documentary, now streaming on Netflix, and … Continue reading

Posted in artist, depression, dreams, fear, feminism, hard work, health, illness, mental illness, music | 8 Comments